blended family help....please!!!

ok....here's a super quick post.....
i'm trying to keep myself occupied because i'm at J's house with the dog. he'll be home in a few minutes from work and then.....ready?.....his ex is bringing the kids over. ugh. i'm dying. like want to crawl in a hole and die, dying.

anyway.....

i need help from my blended family friends. aka brady bunches!!!

i haven't been around J's son too much. this weekend will be the first. but i've been getting along fabulously with his daughter. she's absolutely adorable. the 3 of us (me, J, & daughter) went for lunch the other day. she was SO excited. we sat next to each other. we talked, laughed, danced. she was all huggy and affectionate with me. it was great. so when we got back in the car for me to head back to work, J leaned over and gave me a quick peck. and little lady started crying...a LOT. :( broke my heart. i know she was very tired and i'm the 1st woman who's been around other than her mom...definitely the 1st gf of her daddy that she's met. so while it wasn't expected, i guess i could deal. i mean, i flipped a little bit. am i gonna let a 4 year old dictate my relationship?? but after J explained that he has lots of love and can love lots of people and that she wasn't losing him, she seemed better. she even said she wanted to go to lunch again with me...at bk!

so we're doing the family thing this weekend...as much as the kids want. if they want me to leave, i will. it's completely up to them. oh, and little lady has decided that her daddy can give me kisses on the cheek!!

but, i could use some advice. i've never been with anyone who has kids. what do i need to know? what do i need to watch out for? what should i do? shouldn't do? please help!!!

and all you lurkers who read this but never comment, please comment!!! i REALLY could use the advice right now :)

(and they still arent here yet....my hands are sweaty and i feel like i'm about to vomit. FML)